Procrastination
This semester has been an extremely unique one for me. In the past, I have had lots of projects, papers, and assignments. There was lots to do and there were lots of due dates. For better or worse, this has not been the case.
Every class that I have has simply a midterm and a final test-wise, and outside of that they have assigned just one or two papers. To make matters worse, two of my papers are due dead week, which is the week ust before finals. Coming from the past classes where I constantly had something due, this has been extremely difficult.
I know that I have all sorts of homework to do, but I cannot motivate myself to do it. In my mind, I am screaming at myself to do the reading or start the research. But, at the same time, my I keep thinking, “That’s not due for another 8 weeks. Why waste my time now?”
For the entire first half of the semester, I have struggled with this. Procrastination has become a huge hinderance in my life. Now, don’t get me wrong, the few things that I have had to do, have gotten finished and turned in on time, but I have found it hard to motivate myself to do things due far in the future.
A few days ago, I sat myself down at the computer and began working on a few things for two of my classes. I told myself that I had to get something done. I ended up working until 1:30 AM doing way more than I planned to do. I felt a sense of accomplishment for the first time all semester. Unfortunately, I woke up the next morning back in the rut I was in beforehand.
Along the same line, I have recently been struggling to find the motivation to go the gym. While I am not the smallest girl in the world, going to the gym has always been a part of my routine. No matter how busy I was I would always take time out of my week 3 days a week to work out. Yet, as I am a little “less busy,” I find it harder to motivate myself.
So, I have really been trying to figure out why with more free time, I am less motivated. As of today, I have yet to figure this out. When I am super busy, it seems as if nothing distracts me, but when I am a little less busy, I am unable to get anything done. It is similar to when you get up early, but still end up late for class. And, for me, there is nothing more irratating than that.
While I still do not have the answers to this extreme motivation conundrum, I have learned a few things. First, this is just another way college is preparing me for the future. In the “real world,” there will be lots of times where things don’t have definite due dates, or need to be finished well into the future, that I am still going to need to motivate myself.
But, I also began to wonder why all this matters. I am been stressing out immensly over stuff that isn’t due until December. Why? I have no idea. As long as I get the project or paper done to the best of my ability, does it really matter if I start 2 months ahead of time? While I am probably going to continue to worry about these projects, I am going to make a conscience effort to not let that stress get the best of me. There is a lot of time between now and then, and as long I as don’t put it off until the night before, I will be fine.
So, with that being said, I think the rec center is calling my name. (Oops, I guess I am still putting off my homework.)